Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Burning at These Mysteries




Burning at These Mysteries

I'm constantly challenged by the difference between what I believe about faith versus what I see displayed by others who proclaim their religion for all to see. I've recently made a life-changing decision that I did not come by easily. I am no longer married and I was the one to initiate the divorce. There it is... I did it. I said it.

I don't walk around wearing a sandwich board about the divorce or any of my reasons. I'm not gathering troops to side with me on the issue. I'm just doing the best I can given the changes that are still in progress. What cuts me to the core are those who judge me for "calling it quits" on my marriage without knowing me or the situation. What's worse are that some of these people are slandering me in a public way. Just today, a pastor I've never met before decided to state something publicly about me throwing my husband under a bus. Seriously?!?! Does he really minister to his congregation with this level of blind, public judgment? Anyone with a pulse knows that a person does not file for divorce on a whim. It's a mystery to me that a Pastor would throw stones like this. I'm glad that scars are tougher than regular skin because I just grew a new patch of scar tissue where that stone struck.

If you're reading this Pastor man, pray for me. Pray for me to listen to God and follow Him according to His will. All I can do is the best I know how to do, prayerfully and as humanly faithful as possible. God hates divorce, I realize that. Even so, God knows my heart and I trust that He will hold me accountable for my sins in this world. God's grace is enough.